Thursday, June 08, 2006

The Fitful Sleep Of The Dammed

I'm not gong to hell. The dammed that I speak of is like a block, a barrier or a stop of progression if you will. As I have said in a previous post, my husband and I, and subsequently our children, are in a bit of limbo with the progression of school. You see it has been the dream of my husband to be a teacher since his days in primary school. He would make a great teacher. What he lacks in academics he makes up for in partical ability and experience but Universities don't look at that. Don't get me wrong, he has passed his courses and has earned himself a degree in English, but he is not at the top of his class. How could he be? He is not a twenty year old with little responsibility. He is a father working two jobs, and still below the poverty line, to support his family so his wife can stay home with their two young boys. This year he applied under an alternate application process, that was developed to give those with "special circumstances" and "other qualifications" a chance, but Monday we received notice that he wasn't accepted for his first choice. He is presently being considered for his second and we will know soon if he will be accepted. We have yet to hear from the other institution of higher learning. This has caused me to loose a lot of sleep.

I have been escaping in television at night and this morning I woke up at THREE FREAKING THIRTY! As stressful as this circumstance is, it's not the only thing contributing to my insomnia. As some of you know I am the Enrichment Leader for our ward. It is my responsibility to plan events for our women's group where they can socialize and learn while enjoying the company of people of the same faith. This coming Tuesday is one of our quarterly activities. We are having a "trade show" of sorts to show how one can be active in the community and in our congregation. I was ok yesterday but as I went to sleep I started worrying about it again. Plus my house is a disaster and my weight loss plan has all but left the building so I feel guilt. What I want for my upcoming birthday is a good nights sleep and my husband to get into school. If he doesn't get in I don't know what I will do. This is his "last kick at the cat". His words not mine. It a figure of speech, at least I hope it is, otherwise we will be going to hell.


Sariah said...

I think if there was a soundtrack to go along with our lives, "Misery" and "You Can't Always Get What You Want" would definitely be on there. However, we should add "We Shall Overcome", even though *I* am not really feeling it right now.

Proud Mum said...

So he has his bachelor's degree and needs a master's to teach? Did I read that right? But he can't get into the program without uber-high marks that are really only attainable by someone who doesn't also have life going on at the same time.

That must be so stressful for you. I'm sorry. I hope things will work out soon.

Allrie said...

I was thinking of Sariah as I read this--you two should really commiserate.

Everything will work out in the long run. Do not ask me to define long. Do not ask me how it will turn out. Somehow or other we always manage to survive. Good luck on the sleep :)